Angel Day

It was just a year ago today that my little nephew Henry passed away.  And to be honest, when I sat down to do a post today, I tried to be positive, but all I could think about was how sad it still makes me to think about him.  I remember me and Erin's excitement over Henry and Jack, since they would only be 3 months apart, the buddies that they were going to be, and all the fun we would undoubtedly have with our boys, and it makes me sad.

This past year has been anything but easy; knowing that when we get together there should be two babies, not one, and having to watch Erin and Rob try to find peace at such a hard time.  I think I have said it before, but there isn't anything I wouldn't give to go back and have Henry live.  To have his birthday come and realize that we should be having a big party giving him presents and watching him eat cake was so hard.  I did not loose a son, but I still lost a nephew, and my son's playmate.  And when details of me and Erin's past conversations about our boys' future sneak into my head, it feels as if I am punched in the stomach and my heart aches.  It aches for what I was so sure was going to be, but wasn't.

I don't know why Henry's life was cut so short, but I do know that our Heavenly Father is over all.  And I am trusting in him, that even though this still hurts right now, one day he will make it be okay.  For now, Happy Birthday sweet Henry.  May you look down on us and see how much we love you and look forward to seeing you again.