Dear Jack,

You are at a such fun age.  I feel like I could talk about you for hours because you say and do the funniest things almost daily.  I don't know what our family would do without you.

Preschool has been surprisingly still a very good thing.  You love to go, to do your homework and I am still amazed at all the words, letters and numbers that you are learning each week. I am very confident that you will be ready for kindergarten and do amazing at APA.

Speaking of APA, your little world has gotten shook up the last few months.  I started subbing for the school thinking that you will be there next year and that next year I want to get a more permanent position.  Well, I liked it so much and the school liked me enough that I quickly was offered a full-time position and now you are being watched at three different houses, depending on the day, as well as going to preschool.  I drop you off at 7:30 and don't get to pick you up until after 4.  At first you thought it was a fun change and you went without a fuss.  Lately, you cry when I drop you off on the doorstep and I have to be honest and say that I have really considered quitting because of it.  I hate to see you cry, and I honestly do miss our time together.  Me working on the computer, you playing or watching shows next to me, or finding you asleep in the funniest places.  However, the other 3 kids have loved me being at school with them and I know soon enough you will be there with us all day as well.  

I have not decided what I will do next school year.  I am grateful that you will be there at least half day and that I will get paid this coming summer to stay home with you and the kids.  I am so sorry buddy.  I do hope that I am not setting you up for some major anxiety or separation issues, but I feel that I am where I need to be right now. 

I am also your new primary teacher, which turned out to be a really good thing.  You look forward to the weekends and staying home with me and Dad anyway, but now you and I don't have to be separated on Sundays either.  You are stubborn in class and I am not sure if you would act this way if I wasn't your teacher or not, but we are trying to fix that.  

Pictures still seem to be your least favorite thing to do ever, and you still like to fall asleep in random places if you get the chance.  You are loving your new tablet that you got for Christmas, and love to watch Thomas the Train or the Power Rangers.  You pack your lunch for the next day the night before like the rest of the kids, but if you don't have any more frozen mac n' cheese dinners to take, you will have a meltdown.

I have to add that you were so brave at Disneyland.  We took you on Thunder Mountain Railroad, the swings over at California Adventure and probably a few other things that really you were not mature enough for.  They made you scream bloody murder and I am really afraid that we have scarred you for life.  Thunder Mountain in particular, was the worst.  You went on it first with your dad (I guess went on the train with a 1 on the engine).  You repeated over and over for the rest of the day that you "do not like the #1 train!"  However, most of the rides you fell in love with and would always say "that was so awesome!" coming off of them.

I love how you say "a-cuz" instead of because, how you live in your Batman hoodie and blue jeans and are the pickiest eater but have recently branched out to Nutella sandwiches and toast.  I love your big hugs, insistence on those goodnight kisses, your unfathomable ability to never really get sick.  But above all, I love how you are such a mama's boy and seem to love me unconditionally, even when I make mistakes and don't deserve it.  You are such a joy.  I love you so much.

Love,
Mom

You fell asleep at the Primary Program (day before) practice, right on the stand.  I should've known but still couldn't believe it.

Dear Keaton,

The biggest news is that you are officially on your way to getting your eagle, and already have attended 2 scouting pow wows!  You are up to 6 merit badges already, and just need to create a geocache to get your 7th!  I am so proud of the work you have done.  I am also so grateful for your father, and how he is signing you up for these and doing the homework and requirements with you.  You are lucky to have him as a dad and I hope you thank him someday.  

You are turning into a teenager right before my eyes.  Now that I am working at your school I do occasionally see you in the halls.  Sadly, you already try not to make eye contact with me in the halls unless I touch your arm, but I understand.  You are doing okay in class, seem to either get A's or F's, which I am trying to understand.  I know part of it is that this school's tests are quite harder than other elementaries and you actually have to study for the tests, but I think you are learning that you have to work for your good grades, which is a very good lesson to learn at your age.  Your Nexus 7 tablet that you asked for for Christmas has been taken away for the last few weeks because of it until we see all A's and B's. 

Your favorite friend is still Landon, although you have been doing as I had asked and starting branching out a little bit more, which is great.  You are still playing the trumpet for school, and we are trying to remember to get you to practice playing it every night.  I have a terrible time getting you to read lately, which is bad because that is one of the grades that needs to be brought up, so we are working on that.  You are such a good worker though, and you know how to clean when you want to.  Yesterday, you volunteered to help me with the bathrooms and I was really surprised at how well you cleaned them.  I didn't have to make you redo anything, which seems to be the norm with the other kids (it is probably due to age).   Still, your hard work made me so happy.

You are such a good kid.  Every now and then you tease your brothers and sister and remind me of your father, but for the most part, I love how well you treat everyone and how respectful you are of those older than you.  I can't wait until you are made a deacon in a few week so we will have another priesthood holder in our home, and to take you to the temple to do baptisms.  

I love how you still want me to tuck you in every night, how you will put mustard or BBQ sauce on anything, are starting to say amazing prayers, live in that navy hoodie with the your sleeves rolled up to the elbows, want to walk home from church each Sunday with friends, can't wait to get out sharing time, insist on taking your tennis shoes every day to school so you can play soccer at recess with your friends and slyly keep them on for the rest of school even though it is out of uniform.  I love you so much.

Love, 
Mom

Dear Sam,

We are already halfway through the school year, and I can see great changes in you.  Although school is not your favorite thing, you continue to get pretty good grades.  Santa brought you a Samsung tablet for Christmas and me and your Dad told you guys that it would be taken away if your grades didn't stay up.  This last week we had a bimonthly report card (which is not a final report card).  However, it showed all A's and B's except for 1 F in Spelling, so we had to confiscate it.  (We also had to take away Keaton's, so it wasn't just you).  We want you boys to get used to having A's and B's and working hard to keep those grades up and we think that this will be a good motivator. 

You seem to like me being at the school full-time, and your anxiety as far as school has dropped dramatically because of it.  I occasionally get a glimpse of you in the halls or at recess, and I am happy that you are not too cool yet not to wave or come say hi to your old mom.  All of your teachers say good things about you, especially your reading group teacher, Mrs. Simpson.  She says she only has you and one other boy in your reading group.  That other kid seems to be gone a lot leaving just you and Mrs. Simpson and she says that she honestly would much rather be with you one-on-one than the other kid.  She says you tell her great stories about home and I think she probably knows more about me than I probably would want her to.  Anyway, she always has something nice to say about you and says you are a great kid.

You were put in a higher math at the start of the year, but you started to get overwhelmed with all the homework and we could tell that you needed some help with your multiplication so the school moved you to another class that specializes in multiplication.  It has made such a difference!  It is a little too easy for you so you never seem to have homework and you already seem to have picked up some of the facts that were causing you trouble.  I am so glad we made the switch!  I am really grateful for APA and how they are able to help kids wherever it is that they need help so they can become confident.  It is such a blessing.

You are still the most popular one in the house and everyone that comes to door comes for you.  We seem to always get a group of 5 or 6 boys downstairs playing video games and for some reason all I hear is you.  When you get loud, you get loud.  You also like to be the boss and tell the others what to do.  I can hear that for myself.  Luckily most of the boys don't seem to mind and follow your lead.  It makes me laugh though.

It was so neat to be able to go to the Odgen Temple Dedication with you, Keek and Papa.  It was your first one and I was so proud to have both my boys with us.  I was your primary teacher for the past 6 months or so, and I really enjoyed that time with you.  I wish I had the whole year.  It was over before I knew it!  Now I am Jack's primary teacher and he is so happy to have me with him all through church.  I am so lucky to be able to see so much of my cute kids.

You are still taking art lessons from Mr. Winget and you now have quite an impressive portfolio.  You are now the only one taking lessons of some kind.  I am glad we found something that you enjoy. 

Me and you were a little nervous about going to Disneyland, but I was so proud of the way you managed your anxiety during the trip.  If a certain ride made you anxious, you were able to stand your ground and say you weren't going on it, and consequently, I think you never did have an anxious moment on the trip.  I could tell you are starting to get old because all you wanted to ride was the roller coaster-type and you begged me to go on Space Mountain, one of your favorites.  I used to love Space Mountain but I was avoiding that one this time because it made me nervous.  However, I couldn't say no to you and me and you ended up sitting in the very front, with Papa just behind us.  I did have a few panicky moments in the ride and will not go on it again, but I am glad that I did try it for you.

I love how you are not too old to cuddle, and will snuggle right up to me if I will let you.  I love how you like to stay up reading books with a flashlight and have read many in the last few months.  I love your big dimples when you smile, your willingness to try all new food that is placed before you, your sensitive soul and the many chats we have had just you and I.  You are an amazing kid and I am so happy to be your mom.

Love, 
Mom